Since January of this year, I have counseled with numerous individuals who are already separated, thinking about separation, or filing for divorce and not a day goes by that I don't hear of another person who has been divorced for a number of years. I certainly understand why non-believers get divorced, they have no understanding of what marriage is. In fact, without knowing what God's Word says about marriage, they are blind and ignorant. Since marriage was created by God to be a living portrait on earth of the loving relationship of Jesus Christ with His bride, the church, marriage between a man and woman is to be the same. Everything about a marriage is to glorify God and everything about marriage is to be holy, since God is holy. Thus there really is no such thing as a non-Christian marriage, despite what the world says, especially same sex marriage. Paul wrote to the Ephesian church that "husbands were to love their wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her, to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless" (Ephesians 5:25-27). There is a lot being said in these verses and to be honest I didn't understand all of what Paul was saying when I got married, but I do now because I have matured as a Christian and have continued to die daily to myself. First, when Christ died He sanctified and cleansed the church of all its sin with His blood. He cleanses every Christian from their old ways of sin and sets them apart for special service to Him. Marriage is about love and the kind of love Paul refers to here in the Greek is agape love. The kind of love that seeks the highest good of the other, even if it means to the detriment of one's own comfort, safety, or benefit. Husbands are called to unconditional, self-sacrificing love, that is what the marriage relationship is about. The reason Paul points to Christ is because He is the perfect example of the kind of love expected of godly husbands. Authentic Christlike love means surrendering, sanctifying, forgiving, and honoring. Christ surrendered Himself to death on the cross for our eternal good. If a husband is submitted to God, they exercise humility and are to be willing to give up whatever is needed for the sake of his wife. If a husband's love isn't sacrificial, his wife knows it. If a husband is selfish, the marriage is suffering. If a husband isn't doing for his wife what God expects, then it makes it difficult for his wife to submit to his leadership and to ultimately to lordship in Christ. Finally, husbands must honor their wives, recognizing them as precious gifts from God, this will have a sanctifying influence on his wife. The husband will encourage her spiritual growth and emotionally care for his wife as Christ cares for the church.
In conclusion our world is full of easy believism, a casual view of sin, and a low view of scripture. As a result, easy divorcism is what occurs in churches as Christian couples divorce at the same rate as non-believers who have zero understanding of marriage. A tragedy that is destroying the church and our nation.
